Swift Kick in the Pants

Matilda: So when did you know you wanted to be a model?

Zoolander: Hmmm. I guess it would have to be the first time I went through the second grade, I caught my reflection in my spoon while I was eating my cereal, and I remember thinking: "Wow! You're ridiculously good looking. Maybe you could do that for a career."

Matilda: Do what for a career?

Zoolander: Be professionally good looking.



Maybe all I needed was a swift kick in the pants...

Today was the christening of Jan Simon's Capital Markets class. I loved it. He had the strength and discipline of a trader. He reminded me of an old Tulane Professor of mine, an ex-Morgan Stanley trader, except she was 5 times more brutal. So Jan is nice...

Jan would tower over you and ask you point blank a question about current events, the reading, whatever. If you were not prepared you will not come to class. Reminded me of Professor McNew, only he didn't charge $5 if we were late. And to her on time was late. Arriving 15 minutes early... now that was "on time." Ahh traders. I felt so at home.

The thing I like about Wall Street jobs is that they expect you to handle alot of pressure. And when you overcome that pressure it is the best feeling. And most of the time, these guys on Wall Street seem like a-holes, but out of the office, they can be the sweetest people, often volunteering for charities and such... but always with a certain aura of evil...

I remember a point in class where he was talking about earnings estimates. My mind started to wander as I remember gathering this data on Bloomburg to prepare the sales point memos after we completed a deal. I guess he caught my eyes drifting left in inner monologue much like JD on SCRUBS. Well before I knew it he was standing over me and said, eyes directly on mine: "Ann. Where do we get consensus eps?"

"Analyst reports." Didn't miss a second. But my heart was pounding inside. I loved it.

He talked a bit more and called on a few more people but then he came back to me. "Ann." (gulp). "Who else got fired?" "You mean in Citigroup?" I said. I had no idea. "No, in Banking." "Well,that Merrill Lynch guy (obviously)... what was his name... Weinburg?" "No, Weinburg is Goldman Sachs." Someone else answered the question.

Then finishing the class, we got to talking about economic indicators and before I knew it my hand started going up. I have not looked at economic indicators in 3 years since I was a trader. And I really wasn't sure of my answer. I didn't know why but my hand went up! But before I knew it I was talking about CPI and core CPI. He asked follow up questions to my knowledge, and I didn't have time to think, I just said it. And the answers were right! This guy intimidates more than Mr. Marketing professor, but I loved the interaction between us. He really made me want to learn more about the markets. And for once I felt happy.

I guess I missed the premarket research we did before each trading day. Tracking the economic indicators... making a party on Fed Beige Book day... watching oil, gold & the NASDAQ while simultaneously looking at candlestick charts... the ISM... the craziness on Unemployment Friday! I knew I didn't want to go back into trading, but this was something I loved. Had to find something I can speak to with this....


... I'm sure there is more to life than being really, really ridiculously good looking, and I intend to find out what that is ...